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Letters to a Wriggler.
Letter the third.

Okay, it’s been a little while... I’ve had writer’s block and my mind has been turned upside-down by some memories creeping into my think-pan. Memories that apparently got locked off... but that’s not what I’m here to tell you is it? No it’s not.

Come on big guy, you’ve done this before...

Alright, so I guess it’s about time I told you a little about our home at the time of writing. I’m certain things will have changed some by the time you get to read this, but having a record of how things are now seems like a good idea to me.

So, first and foremost we have the ‘main room’, the ‘lounge’, the ‘computer room’... whatever you want to call it, it’s the social hub of the whole asteroid. This room is where important shit seems to happen, which is unsurprising. It’s been largely cleared of computers and whatnot (probably Sollux did that before I showed up) and most of it has been tidied up and repurposed, too. A lot of the space near the middle is taken up by a knot of couches, set in a vague circle around a big old wooden coffee-table. Of to one side from that is a pile of old horns, the honking sort of horn, left by Gamzee which no-one has ever had the heart to throw out or mess with, against the day he might return... off in one corner is a little kitchenette deal that I set up with a sink and mini hunger trunk and a kettle and everything so I can whip up snacks and beverages at any time, even if I’ve left my coat behind. Also, by popular demand, there’s a few windows in the outside wall and a door out onto the dusty landscape of the asteroid. Technically speaking that door should lead out into hard vaccuum and death, but for some reason we can walk around in space with no equipment whatsoever. Weird, huh?

After that in apparent importance is the communal kitchen, which is off down a corridor a little way. All gleaming stainless steel and tiles, this place has been the focus of slow and incremental change from the beginning. I think it started as sort of a cold storage room, but has been gradually repurposed into a serious kitchen sufficient to store all of our communal food and all the things you’d need to cook or store it. It’s also a good place to get away from the hubbub in the lounge, should you feel the need, and the furnishings make hanging out there mostly comfortable.

Next along is the library. This is... a lot less finished than the previous two. Mostly I think it’s where Rose used to do her research back in the day and it has become a sort of store room for our collected knowledge and media. It’s a bugger to find what you need and not a very comfortable place, so people don’t go down there too often, but bring a cushion and you can get some serious research done, or just lounge around and quietly read a book. Oh, and there’s a coffee machine in there, too... for a given value of the word ‘coffee’. I’m serious, that stuff is rank! The machine always seems to seep some weird coloured liquid into your drink, too...

Near the bowels of the asteroid are the systems that actually gave the place it’s original purpose, the holy scientific trinity of the Genelab, Biolab and the Ectobiology Suite. These three rooms and their associated spaces take up a good chunk of one whole floor, and between them we can do incredible things. It’s also where most of the serious work aroung here gets done, beyond simply keeping the place from falling apart and all of us alive. Usually they’re all locked and only a handful of us have keys or passcodes, but this is for the best, I reckon, considering the things that could concievably be done with these facilities...

Downstairs from all this is the Gym... Kannus’ Gym. It’s really just a room where he keeps his weights and treadmill and stuff, but other people have used it in the past, so I feel justified calling it a Gym. Not much to say about it, really, ask Kannus (the Candyblooded one) about it if you want specifics.

Next door to the Gym, via a walled we knocked through, is the Arena. This started out as where Equius kept his robots and tools and such I think, along with storage cages and pens for various contraptions and I think some of the beasts of war that this place was originally designed to produce. After Feferi and I got to work, however, it became a genuine live-combat arena-cum-dojo where any and all can learn from eachother, spar, train against robots or fight some Underlings for fun and profit.

Back up to the more inhabited bits of the asteroid we’ve got the bedrooms and respiteblocks, organised into wings for convenience. Turn one way an you’ve got the sleeping quarters for single Trolls, the other way for Humans, and along the middle is a section housing the oddities (such as Cherubim and what-have-you), mixed couples and family quarters. It’s down here that you’d find your uncles’ shared block, Kannus and Anelie’s suite and our family Hive, of course.

Not far from there are the bathrooms, plural. This place was never designed to be lived in, but we’ve made adaptations and it’s all fairly comfortable. Aside from a handful of simple toilets, the ‘main’ one is actually rather a shower-room, but it serves most folks pretty well. There’s also a nice bath/hottub I made a way back, tucked in near the back in a service room amongst a lot of piping and suchlike. It’s well worth a visit out there to get an actual bath, trust me... Ahhh, good times, right hun?

Uhhh, what else? Well, I suppose there’s the transportalizer systems. We’ve mangled them pretty badly in our remodelling of the place, but they still work, if you know what you’re doing. One of them leads to a beach on a Dream-Bubble of Beforus and you need a return module to reliably get back, so be careful of that. Also there’s a time machine, just to make those amusing shenanigans that much more likely (actually, we had a really good reason for building it, and we’re not about to take it apart now, who knows when a working time machine will come in handy?). I forget what else, I’m sure there’s some details I’m missing... Oh! Outside there’s a number of towers that look like rusted pieces of crap, do not fuck with these. I’m serious, there’s some major mad science going on there, and they provide most of our power.

Oh well, Daddy’s tired and out of shit to say at any rate. Run along, now. I’ll see you next time.

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